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小学生的试卷有多离谱...老师:真就不顾我的死活吗哈哈哈

  • 2026-03-14 00:45:04
小学生的试卷有多离谱...老师:真就不顾我的死活吗哈哈哈

作者：周星星     

来源：吐槽星君(ID：tucaoxingjun）

人民教师总是戏称：
“上辈子杀猪，这辈子教人”，
如果再教上小学生，
起码杀了两辈子猪的福气

血压高了▼
妈妈：
我真的会谢
▼
校长：
这是作文，
不是批斗校长大会
▼
笑不活了▼
哈哈哈同情老师▼
老师：
打败我的不是天真，是无邪...▼
老师：抑郁了
▼
笑拉了▼
孩子可不兴煮啊
▼
你勇敢你行▼
姨夫很难不emo
▼
先买车还是先买房，
困扰年轻人的一大问题，
如今有了新解
（via.@萌娃）
《少走一辈子弯路》
跟老公一起上坟，
但是找不着祖宗在哪里
（via.Liyuan）
等我儿考上清华，
冒青烟的那个就是了
人生建议：
不要穿黑衣服看电影
（via.说的什么鸟东西？）
大哥心里首先想：
这椅子怎么知道，
我故意坐错位置了
发生尴尬的事情后，
那就用另一件更尴尬的事情掩盖它
（via.@我朋友是个奇葩）
面子保住了，
但又好像没保住
婆婆跟我显摆她女儿孝顺，
我这做儿媳的怎么能输
（via.@叙颜）
情商拉满满的溢出来
爸妈的幼稚跟娃的成熟成鲜明的对比
（via.@杰克波比）
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小孩：
你们什么时候能成熟点，
早知道不带这俩货出门了
上身衬衣手表下身就…
过于潦草了些
余华老师是懂商务休闲穿搭的
只是想拍个视频罢了，
看把大爷给吓得
大爷：
今天出门没看黄历，
溜了溜了
《最丑的喜羊羊系列》
（via.@大头和他的朋友们）
别乱说啊，
这里面再丑也没有喜羊羊
得知顾客被蛇咬了，
外卖小哥差点把电动车蹬冒烟
（via.微言）
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16:18分拿到药，
16:22分送达
得意也不能忘形啊，
哈哈哈哈哈哈
看清楚他吃了个什么了吗
今日份的快乐源泉就到这里了！

本文来源：周星星，来源：吐槽星君（ID：tucaoxingjun），周星星，一个灵魂段子手，百万都市青年的快乐源泉。

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  1. CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000501s ] mysql:host=127.0.0.1;port=3306;dbname=www_sjds;charset=utf8mb4
  2. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `fenlei` [ RunTime:0.000675s ]
  3. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `fid` = 0 [ RunTime:0.000734s ]
  4. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `fid` = 63 [ RunTime:0.000293s ]
  5. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `set` [ RunTime:0.000470s ]
  6. SELECT * FROM `set` [ RunTime:0.000219s ]
  7. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `article` [ RunTime:0.000596s ]
  8. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` = 464548 LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000460s ]
  9. UPDATE `article` SET `lasttime` = 1773464348 WHERE `id` = 464548 [ RunTime:0.008617s ]
  10. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `id` = 65 LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000259s ]
  11. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 464548 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000484s ]
  12. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` > 464548 ORDER BY `id` ASC LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000428s ]
  13. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 464548 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 10 [ RunTime:0.004879s ]
  14. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 464548 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 10,10 [ RunTime:0.001039s ]
  15. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 464548 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 20,10 [ RunTime:0.001430s ]
0.089836s